I can’t cope

[Snowie]

Hi @tyme 

I hope your day was ok

[tyme]

I've been busy all day so now, when I'm on the forums, I can unwind a bit 🙂 @Snowie 

Hugs to you.

[tyme]

Are you at work @Captain24 ?

[Captain24]

I came home from work early. I didn’t do the last 2 hours of overtime. I couldn’t. I couldn’t cope. I did everything wrong and the only person that got singled out was me. 

I was left so anxious going to the tip head that I was shaking and crying. 

I cried all the way home. 

Im not ok. I’m really struggling. Right now I don’t want to do life anymore. I’m just not good enough. I don’t deserve it. I have nothing to offer. Why am I even here. What’s the point. 

[optimisticc]

Hi @Captain24,

It sounds like you were feeling so overwhelmed at work, and being singled out for your mistakes sounds like it has led to you feeling really down on yourself and like you have nothing to offer. 

I have sent you an email just checking in. I encourage you to continue engaging here for support, and to reach out for immediate help if you feel like you need it. 

Take care Captain24

[Captain24]

I’ve had a shower and washed my hair. I’ve changed my sheets and doona cover. I just need all remnants of work off me. At least I have 4 days before I have to face it again. 

I’ve done 2 loads of washing, I’m going to hang them out in the rain and then I’ll go to bed. Maybe I may wake up feeling a little better. I can only hope in a world where I have no hope. 

[Ru-bee]

Hi @Captain24 I' really proud of you for having the energy to do those acts of self-care when you got home after such a hard shift.

I hope you're getting some rest now, but I'm sending you some hugs and will be around today if you're up and need to talk

[Jynx]

Been rough for ya hey @Captain24 🥺

Here for you hun, lemme know if you want some distracty chats 💜

[Captain24]

Thanks @Ru-bee @Jynx 

It’s been really tough.

Ive only just woken up. I needed that sleep. I’m still reeling from what I have been through. 

Ive still lost a lot of confidence in myself. I did try reframing my thoughts ‘it’s just a bad day’ ‘I am extra sensitive because my period is due’ I’m proud of myself for reframing but I just didn’t believe them.

I have a psych appointment tomorrow 4hrs away. It’s at the hospital I go to. I’m hoping I can hold myself together. I think she will be proud of the reframe. 

Im still not feeling real good though. Plus I’m now beating myself up for sleeping so long. 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 hey that's okay!! I never believed my own affirmations and reframes at first either. Funny thing about humans, we are actually more and more likely to believe something the more we hear it! So even if it doesn't feel like it has made a difference today, it's still practice!! Good on you 😊