26-09-2014 06:49 PM
26-09-2014 06:49 PM
Walking in nature is good for the soul. ❤️
02-10-2014 05:56 PM
02-10-2014 05:56 PM
Hi MrsC,
Thought I would send a quick note to see how you are doing?
Hobbit.
02-10-2014 06:55 PM
02-10-2014 06:55 PM
02-10-2014 07:27 PM
02-10-2014 07:27 PM
That's beautiful MrsC, in the face of everything, you find things to be thankful for.
That shows to me what a wonderful person you must really be.
It really reflects that saying "there is hope".
Thank you!!
Hobbit.
07-10-2014 09:35 PM
07-10-2014 09:35 PM
Horrible day...
Went to hubbys office (not ideal but he has his own office so the door can be shut), I haven't seen him for 3 weeks & all I'm getting is a txt a week, i'm sending one every other day with high emotional content a la counsellor. Still won't tell me where he is staying. Has now been out of the house over 4 months.
Dropped by unnanounced to return his wedding ring I had fixed for him, we were in the middle of what I thought was an ok conversation when I mentioned & repeated how important it is for him to have the right diagnosis & the right meds to begin his journey (still has no psych assessment - I mentioned we might be able to go to another GP reggistered with BB & get referral signed) & he went off. If we had been at home in old habits he would have walked out the door & I wouldn't have known when he was coming back. He tried to shut me down by asking me to leave- i said i wouldn't go until he was calm & speaking to me nicely. In the course of the argument he left the office, returning after less than a minute, threw his wedding ring at me & stuck his fingers in his ears.
The whole time I kept doing the 3 part sentences, what he did, how it made me feel & what I wanted. I think he was frustrated because he couldn't shut me down as usual. Eventually he clamed & walked me to the lift & was furious when I kissed him on the lips in front of secretaries.
He says he blames me for his depression - I have no idea how to respond to this - the worst I have ever done is withdraw from unacceptable behaviour & call him on that behaviour. I have no idea what I have done to deserve being treated this way, he seems to be re writing history & saying I bullied him! his profession means he thinks & speaks "on his feet" & basicaly no one would argue with him, never mind bully him.
Joint counselling on Thurs I hope he turns up
07-10-2014 10:45 PM
07-10-2014 10:45 PM
Hi @Former-Member
Sorry to hear about your terrible experience today.
You don't deserve to be treated that way. It sounds like you did a good job at standing up to him, but he continually tried to 'one up you' by doing horrible things like throwing his ring at you. That's just my perspective. It might not have been a concious thing on his behalf.. I'm not sure.
I have seen other people around the forums talk about trying to remove the person from the illness and try and think as if it's the illness talking, not your husband. There is a point though where you have to draw a line and look after yourself.
We're all here to support you, so I hope you keep coming back and keep us updated. I think I've also seen you around posting elsewhere, so I'm glad you're getting involved in other areas.
Above all, I just wanted to say, please don't take it personally, or in any way feel this is a reflection of you. I don't think you have... It seems you have got some good perspective that it's your husband's illness, not you - but regardless... I just wanted to say that.
Take care
07-10-2014 10:58 PM
07-10-2014 10:58 PM
08-10-2014 07:23 AM
08-10-2014 07:23 AM
Yes, I agree with everything Eagle has said. It's a nightmare for you but please try to keep reminding yourself that it's the illness talking and behaving, not the man you originally married. I'm not making excuses for his behaviour but if you can keep remiinding yourself of this, it may help a little. I'm so sorry you're going through all this. ❤️
08-10-2014 03:42 PM
08-10-2014 03:42 PM
08-10-2014 04:39 PM
08-10-2014 04:39 PM
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