Lived Experience Forum

[Dimity]

Heart OK (touch wood), scared of upcoming cataract op since I only have 1 eye, and as soon as I'm clear from the eye op I'll have a hysterectomy. I'll be a new person.

[Shaz51]

@Dimity I have a cataract in my left blind eye which they will not remove because it might affect my right eye xx

[Dimity]

Hugs @Shaz51 I can so understand. But it's tough having one eye. It's been easier for me since I got a discount taxi card. Is your other eye OK?

[Shaz51]

@Dimity 

Without glasses I am no good , will have to get stronger ones in the future 

Hope you have someone helping you after your op xx

[NatureLover]

Thanks, @Dimity . I'm using the lightbox for half an hour in the early mornings. My psychiatrist said I could increase the use over winter, but my skin gets too itchy when I do that. It's a catch-22. I think maybe I need to increase the usage as depression is worse than itchiness. 

Yes, I'm OK for groceries thank you. I need to go out to Coles but have been putting it off as I have enough different stuff at home. I'm hoping to go out to Coles tomorrow morning maybe. I have some library books 🙂

Thank you so much for your kind germ-free warm hugs ❤️

What extra MH help have you requested? Crossing my fingers for you... 

Sending you good wishes back ❤️

[Dimity]

1/2 hr extra light doesn't seem much @NatureLover. I hope you can extend it without suffering too much especially your poor hands

I rang the local MH triage who apparently act as gatekeepers for all community services to see if I could get an extension before the psychologist discharges me but I've probably put my foot in it as they said they'd talk to my gp and psychiatrist as well - I can't call them my team as none of them communicate with each other. I feel bad about it. I shouldn't have wasted their time.

I'm half asleep so I'll close. I hope you can get what you need  from Coles.

[NatureLover]

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@Dimity wrote:

1/2 hr extra light doesn't seem much @NatureLover. I hope you can extend it without suffering too much especially your poor hands

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Thank you ❤️ I'm trying to extend it by 15 minutes, starting today. If 45 minutes goes OK for a while, I'll bring it up to an hour. 

I don't think you've wasted their time. I'm not sure why your GP, psychologist and psychiatrist don't talk to each other, but you are still in need. I'm sending wishes that you can get the MH help 🤞

Not sure if I'll make it out today. The most important thing is trying to get to work tomorrow. It will be a big stressful day as I will be so behind. 

My psychologist has recommended that I estrange my abusive father, so I have a lot to think about. I probably won't do it in the end, but it's tempting. 

I hope today is a better day for you 🤞

[Dimity]

Sending wishes you can brave the supermarket if you're so inclined @NatureLover 

I can understand how reflecting on estranging your abusive father would be upsetting... for me I'd probably feel paralysed by indecision. As it turned out I remained in contact with my abusive parents although they'd almost invariably let me down, and I did my best for them in their old age. Most of my siblings turned against me and I felt scapegoated for reasons I didn't understand. They've ghosted me for years.

I hope this difficult situation hasn't contributed to your slump, and that your psychologist can support you through it. Is it something you can share with other family members? Feeling loved and supported in whatever you decide is so important. It almost feels trite to say it, but your forum family is here for you.

@Shaz51 @tyme 

[Dimity]

Sending a cheerio @NatureLover . 

[NatureLover]

Thank you for your kind and considered response @Dimity.

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@Dimity wrote:

As it turned out I remained in contact with my abusive parents although they'd almost invariably let me down, and I did my best for them in their old age. 

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I'm so impressed by your kindness and strength in doing this.

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@Dimity wrote:

Most of my siblings turned against me and I felt scapegoated for reasons I didn't understand. They've ghosted me for years.

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I'm so sorry to hear this 😭 Especially as you were the one taking care of your abusive parents.

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@Dimity wrote:

Is it something you can share with other family members?

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No, my 3 other siblings support my father. I risk possible estrangement from any or all of them if I do this. 😢

Thank you for your kind words of support ❤️

I managed to go to the supermarket on Sunday and work on Monday. But yesterday set everything back - I had a pap smear with my new GP. She used a different method than I was used to and it was so painful I screamed. She eventually used a different method and it got done, but I was in shock and had to sit in my car, not safe to drive. When I got home I went to bed and stayed there. I haven't been able to get warm since and am feeling so fragile and defeated. I might go back to bed after breakfast. 

I hope that you are not too sore after your mammoth effort yesterday, and can do whatever you need to today 🤞