to work or not to work?

[Former-Member]

I was offered a job today for next school term (i'm a teacher), but im really not sure if i am up to it or not. Financially i feel this massive pressure to take it because things are so tight and my ex wont pay child support etc but I have court in the first week of term (relating to my ex and his violence) then there will be a family court trial later in the term (because i'm assuming he'll get off because its so hard to prove) and its going to stir up so much. I'm so grateful to be offered the job and different people on my mental health team are saying different things.. the social worker thinks it would be good for me to get back to work because im so isolated and alone all of the time but i'm not sure the psychiatrist will even give me a clearance yet as i've been really low lately and sh a lot.i was kind of excited about it to start with but then so much reality comes into my head like no after school care for my lil guy after kindy etc have to move my daughter to the school i'm going to 

I dont know what to od though and im not good at saying no either...

LJ

[CherryBomb]

Hi @Former-Member

aggh, seems like your're caught between a rock and hard place.

While I can't tell you what to do, I can share with you what I do when I'm confronted with a tough decision. I firstly look at my options, and each of their consequences both in the short and long time. Then I ask myself which of the consequences I would prefer/not prefer. This usuallly helps to give me some clarity in clear as mud kind of way. Mind you, it might not have to be one or another. I wonder if you can look into working but perhaps nt so many hours?

There's this thread started by @730. It's about work and mental illness, and how people manage the two. In it @INSIDEOUT @Tight-Control and are among a few that provide advice about balance.

CB

[Former-Member]

Thanks @CherryBomb

I'm so torn between the conflicting advice that im being given by people too and don't want to let anyone down. But i'm going to have a look at the school today, and just see how it feels to be back in a school, around tall and shorter humans. Lol they might take one look at my tired eyes and think im not ready anyways hehe! There's no choice about the hours for this job perse but there is a little bit of flexibility in the days. oh crappy crap crap i dont know what i'm doing.

[NikNik]

@Former-Member It sounds like you're doing a really good job and weighing up the pros and cons of a really important decision!

I use to be a teacher, so I understand how many pros and cons there are just in the job itself, and that's not even considering the pros and cons of the changes on life outside of work.

I hope going to the school today has helped you move towards a decision 🙂

[Former-Member]

So everything is a mess. After lots of thinking about what to do, getting clearance to go back to work by the psychiatrist, i decided to go back to work...

To get the clearance from the dr I spoke to my mental health worker at the hospital where I see him and spoke honestly iwth her about my worries about going back to work and the benefits of going back to work. She was supportive and said she thought going back to work would be really beneficial for me especially as it was only part time. So she wrote to the dr for a clearance because my daughter was sick and had been in hospital so i had to change my appointment telemed time to next month (he's supposedly only available here once a month even by telemed). So last week got things organised my new boss did all the paper work and i arranged childcare for my son on the day he would be needing it, told my daughter about moving schools and she was excited. Then Friday i get a call from mental h elath worker saying the psychiatrist wanted to speak to me this week. 'Saw' him yesterday by telemed and he told me hes changed his mnd about the clearance because he wasnt made fully aware that the criminal case against my ex partner would be quite close to before i go back to work so he wanted to add a paragraph to say that I cant work for at leaast a month after that finishes. Of course the job cant wait that long for me so i've lost it. Im a bit annoyed iwth the mental health worker because i spoke with her about that aspect of it! and now i'm crushed because the decision can be taken away from me and i had gotten a little be excited about the prospect and thinkin about the job. 

My daughter is devastated as well because she's not going to the new school and when i told her school last week about her moving to the new schol they took her out of the drama production for eisteddford theyre doing early next term and now she cant be in it because the paperwork is all done or something. Just a nother mess! I'm just feeling so crushed and flat and useless. 😞

LJ